I love sleeping. So. So. Much. However, this is the time of year every year (Which I didn’t even realize until a blog reader noticed a trend a few years ago in my posts as years went on!), I get a case of the winter blues…. cabin fever…. whatever you want to call it.
I usually combat my malaise with a vacation to someplace sunny and warm. This year, I let Lonnie talk me into vacationing much earlier than usual, bringing us back to Maine with lots more winter left. This has been a VERY mild, and non-snowy winter, but it’s still winter. I still don’t want to go outside for a walk or a run, we aren’t going out hiking and fishing and stuff on the weekends, and there is not a lot else to do around here other than shopping and the movies.
So I have been sleeping. A LOT. My main excuse that I use is, “I sleep late because my job keeps me up late and messes up my sleep schedule.” Which is true sometimes. But not every day. Honestly, I wake up naturally around 8-9ish, and then force myself to go back to sleep thinking, “Why get up? To just go downstairs and watch TV or clean? Fuck that. I may as well go back to sleep.”
On Saturday I stayed in bed til noon-ish. I felt like crap when I finally dragged myself out of bed with that all-too-familiar “slept too much” feeling. I decided that it was time to face that I had a problem, and even to say it out loud to Lonnie. I even threw out the “D” word (DEPRESSION, silly, not divorce!). We decided, based on all the other symptoms I would need to have, that I am not having the D word, but that I am in a bad habit that needs to be broken. …and very possibly toeing the line of the D word. So I made a “contract” with him to start getting up at 9 every day (well unless I have worked an overnight shift, of course). Even if I was up too late, or don’t want to, I GET UP! If I am that tired, I can take a nap in the afternoon.
Today is day 3 of this, and not-gonna-lie, it’s been tough. BUT it has also been extremely rewarding! I don’t feel like a sloth. Once I am up, and have dragged myself out of bed, I feel ENERGIZED! Yesterday I had SO much time, even BEFORE I started my work shift at noon!! I have FELT like cleaning! I have FELT like organizing! It honestly FEELS LIKE SPRING, even though the weather has not changed.
They say “walk the walk.”
They say “fake it til you make it.”
THEY ARE RIGHT!