Listen!!

Dear Diary, It has been 7 days since I last listened to Dr. Laura. I went as far as to let my Sirius Radio subscription lapse, just to get off the sauce 😉 While I am starting to feel cleansed of bitchy, judgmental, righteousness, I miss the chatter, the conversation, the stories of the people who call! My lifestyle and job leave me with a LOT of listening time as I am aLONE aLOT, but busy doing things.  I’ve tried a few podcasts and nothing hooked me in.

Before I was big non-book-reading loser, I used to read books …ALL THE TIME! Then for some reason, I couldn’t anymore. I just can’t sit and focus and read without my mind wandering. Magazines? yes. Articles? HELL YES…. ALL DAMN DAY! But books…. No.  And these days I have to read so much stuff for school, I don’t even want to THINK about reading.Screenshot_20170411-102955

The other day I was watching a makeup video and she was talking about her love of audible, so I thought I’d give it a try.  (Ok, ANOTHER try, I’ve tried listening to books before and that whole mind wandering thing resulted in me spending more time rewinding to try to find where I stopped listening.)

Long story long….

I am currently listening to The Handmaid’s Tale which is RIGHT UP MY ALLEY!!  I loooooooove me some post-apocalyptic/dystopian society shit! (If you have read this already, you see the irony that I left Dr Laura and jumped into this….) I LOVE THIS!!! I can listen in the car… and anywhere in my house, I can just say, “Alexa, open the Handmaid’s Tale,” and off we go!

I haven’t yet decided if I will keep Audible after the free trial, we are TRYING to have LESS 14.95, 9.99, 12.95/per month things and it seems like every time we get rid of one, we add another. AND THAT’S HOW THEY GET YA!!!!

But… I mean…. I DID cancel my Sirius Radio.…. 😉

Dr. Laura hates fat people, and really is an idiot. ​Yet I keep listening.

Dr. Laura:  How tall are you and what do you weigh?
Glutton for punishment: 5′ 6″ 240
Dr. Laura: You are in a medical emergency.  You need to see a doctor right away. And it needs to be a doctor whose expertise is people who are grossly overweight.  You can’t do this on your own, you need to be under a doctor’s care.  A doctor who specializes in people who are GROSSLY. OVER. WEIGHT.
Glutton for punishment: Well I am in a fitness challenge right now where we all exercise and eat right and stuff like that.

Dr. Laura: You shouldn’t be doing that.  I don’t like that.  You are way too far gone to be doing it that way.  You need to see a doctor and maybe have one of those stomach-shrinking procedures. I really don’t like those challenges for people that far gone.  It’s dangerous.

(Dr Laura also tossed in some “lazy, and undisciplined” remarks too, just to make sure she was getting her point across)

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From this challenge, exercise, and healthy food loving fat chick.  F–K YOU!

 

Grossly overweight.  How about GROSSLY UNPROFESSIONAL!!!???  A person calls you, a “professional,” for advice on why you have trouble staying motivated to lose weight, and you tell her to stop exercising and eating healthy food. And then flippantly insist to her that only an invasive surgery with a 10-50% percent success rate (depending on what study you read) will help her.  I can’t even imagine how disappointed that woman must have been when she hung up that phone. I’ll bet you a dollar that ice cream was consumed soon thereafter, because, why bother?  A “professional” told her that her efforts were useless.

I would say that 80 percent of Dr. Laura’s calls are her telling people to eliminate negative and destructive people from their lives. After 20 years of listening, consider yourself eliminated, Dr. Negative.

 

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Me.  Somehow living through a jog.  On a hot day EVEN!

 

 

Day 2 – The headache has arrived!

Breakfast: Green Beans, chicken, little bits of bacon. YES PLEASE

I woke up this morning with a rager of a headache.  I know this headache well…. it’s my body screaming, “WHERE THE FUCK IS ALL MY SUGAR!!!!!!??????  I LOVE THAT SHIT!!!!  GIMME GIMME GIMME!!!”  I ALSO woke up this morning feeling physically ’empty’ and flatter.  Losing water and bloat, I assume.  I LOVE this feeling.  It feels like success and that screams MUCH louder than the headache!

Day 1 was a resounding success!!  I worked a 14 hour shift and felt the pangs of temptation a few times.  It was a looooong, annoying day, as I was assigned to a task that I do not enjoy because the usual person who does it and likes is it on vacation.  The worst part of the day was lunchtime.  It was FREEZING and blustery yesterday, and I dreaded the thought of getting out of the car to go into the grocery store salad bar.  I longed to stay in my warm, cozy car drive through my favorite McDonald’s and nosh on a yummy “Number 2 with the cheeseburgers plain and a diet coke.”  But I didn’t!  I braved the cold, got my salad, and it was delicious!  I think it helped that I had a filling. hearty breakfast, so I wasn’t ready to eat my arm off when I was able to break for lunch (We don’t have set ‘lunch breaks.’  We take it when we can get it).

Oddly enough I am listening to Dr Laura right now and someone has called because she is 100lbs overweight and wants to be able to lose weight to manage her diabetes and have a baby.  She talked about her cravings and her battle/struggle with weight loss and Dr Laura finally stopped her and said;
“For you, feeling good in the moment takes priority.  It’s a choice.”  Story. of. my. life.  And not even with just food.  I do what I want, when I want.  If I don’t feel like doing something, I don’t do it. (Well except for at work, of course! I love my job and I work with high caliber people who are awesome at their jobs and that shit is contagious!)

She then had the lady take out a chocolate bar and break off a piece and say out loud;
“I can choose you.  Or I can choose to lose 100 pounds.  I choose you.”  then she had her eat the chocolate.  She went through this several times.

I am SO going to do this! 

Today’s challenges:

  • We are midst snowstorm.  Fortunately I knew it was coming and shopped yesterday to prepare, but there is something about being snowed in that makes you want treats.  I’ll be fine though.  I’m still early enough in the diet that it’s still exciting and new and I love eating the stuff!
  • I’m covering the overnight shift tonight for the vacationing co-worker.  Still not sure how I am going to handle overnight shifts.  I guess if I get called out, I will bring a snack?
  • I had gym plans today… but not sure that will happen in the storm. SO… if I don’t go to the gym there is NO reason that that I can’t exercise here at home.  None!