|Roadrunner back in action
Today I cried in my staff meeting. Like a moron. One of my coworkers talked about her daughter turning 18 and their great relationship and how she knows she will move out soon, but since they are so close she will see her all the time. All I could think about was Jessi’s impending departure. I’ve actually been cool with it lately and thought I was over the hump. I guess that’s not a thing. Typing this now I realize I am totally full of shit. Just last night we were looking at upcoming movie trailers and I was deep breathing and fighting tears because Lonnie, Jessi, and I watch EVERY horror movie that comes out… even the dumb ones like Unfriended. (OMG so… so…. bad)
Once I got home, I continued to feel “on the verge,” then Sean and his shenanigans pissed me off and my brain just frantically racing that it needed something, Lonnie to come home? a glass of wine? candy? A cry myself to sleep then nap? When SUDDENLY…. it hit me.
I NEED A GOOD HARD FUCKING RUN!
I didn’t even know what to do with that thought. It’s been YEARS since that happened. Probably around divorce time. Honestly I pushed it away initially because it was so weird and went upstairs to force myself to take a nap. But once I got up there, I thought to myself, “How STUPID are you to FIGHT OFF the urge you are having to go for a run, dumbass?”
So I did it. Obviously there was a lot of walking as well… but there was definite pavement pounding and IT. FELT. AWESOME!!!!!